This just in

According to one of Batman's ninth grade students, "God has been around for, like, ever."

Zen and the art of Ford Focus maintenance

Here's a little-known fact about me: I like to fix things. Toilets, pipes, tree removal, whatever: I hate paying other people to do things I think I'm perfectly capable of doing. Now, I may NOT be capable of doing them, but I at least want to try.

My left tail light went out the other day. No biggie; I can change a light bulb. Unfortunately, the part that the light bulb plugged into had melted out of shape, and the nice man at the auto parts store had to break it to remove it. Long story short, I had to strip the existing wires and crimp in a replacement piece.

So this is what I did after work today (note the liberal use of electrical tape):

Ta da! It works!

I want to send a big shout-out to Pop, because if it weren't for him I'd be much less likely to know my way around those needle-nosed pliers. Also, madd propz to Ken at O'Reilly Auto Parts for selling me the $3 part instead of trying to convince me I needed a new $150 tail light. Thanks for not patronizing the little lady. And last but not least, thanks to my husband Batman for coming outside and congratulating me on my successful repair, even if he did refuse to join my in my Victory Dance of Awesomeness in the driveway.

But he did compliment my Spaghetti of Awesomeness later, so it's all good.

How conveeeeenient

So there was this tree in our backyard that was getting too big for the yard, and we'd decided to have it removed in the spring.

Thanks, Ike!

One of our neighbors brought over his chain saw and chopped it up into pieces, and now it looks like this:

There's a matching pile on the other side of the driveway. It took nearly 4 hours to get it all hauled from back yard to curb and rake up the rest of the debris, but our backyard looks great now!

We still have no power, but our water heater is gas so we have plenty of hot water. I cannot tell you what a difference that makes--after Hurricane Charley, the combination of no electricity, hot weather and cold showers made us very cranky. Now its almost like a vacation! I'm a little tired of peanut butter--I think it's coming out of my pores--but I'm at work today and the deli downstairs is open for lunch, so hopefully a nice turkey sandwich will make it all better.

Batman and the girls are out of school at least until Thursday. They called me a little while ago from Starbucks, where they were enjoying hot chocolate and the nice weather. Leave it to Batman to find an open Starbucks in our hurricane-ravaged town!

Face Time!

I didn't have enough to do, so I joined Facebook. Will you be my friend? If you do, you can get fascinating updates into what I'm doing at any given time, like this:

Lar is: pretending that Hurricane Ike does not exist.

Lar is: going to get extra water and batteries anyway.

Lar is: about to watch Project Runway.

Lar is: going to fold laundry while I watch it.

Lar is: still pretending there's no hurricane.

Lar is: going to eat the rest of the ice cream (tonight) in case the power goes out (Saturday).

Lar is: getting off work at noon tomorrow and all day Friday, because of this theoretical non-existent hurricane.

Lar is: still pretending.

Lar is: deep in denial.

Playing catch-up

So much has happened in the last two weeks! School started for all of us, Number One had a birthday . . . well, it was just those two things really, but it's been very hectic.

School is going well for the girls. Special has the same teacher as last year (and they adore each other), and Number One has the nicest, kindest teacher ever--I want to pick him up and squeeze him, but he's about a foot taller than me. Both girls enjoy school, although Special is a little bored with first grade. I think she really hoped they'd get into calculus or algebra this year--all this counting business is beneath her.

On her birthday (she's TEN!), Number One took brownies to share with her class, and that weekend GrandBob took us to Logan's ("it's a roadhouse", she said) to celebrate. GrandMom & GrandBob gave her a gift card, and I think it was the most exciting of all her gifts. She kept saying, "I got a debit card!"

I took her shopping yesterday to spend it, and it was so fun to watch her choose what she wanted. When I was ten, my dad described me as being at that age where I'd tear my pantyhose going down the slide at McDonald's, and that's exactly where Number One is. She bought herself a new purse, wallet and shirt at Justice, then got some new toys for her Build-A-Bear collection at the mall, and was equally excited about all of it. She's so precious, and I can't believe she's TEN.

Last Saturday we had a party for her at Laser Quest, and I think I might have had more fun than anyone. It had been far too long since I'd played laser tag! We invited our next door neighbor, a little girl from church, and two of Number One's friends from school, and it was one of our best parties ever. I think I want to have MY birthday at Laser Quest next year!

Number One had requested a Camp Rock cake, and it turned out . . . not bad. The lake was a little runny, and I should have done the "Camp Rock" sign in white gel icing instead of red, but the girls thought it was great so that's all that mattered. I thought later I should have built a little cabin out of pretzel sticks and put it in the far corner, but at least it won't end up on Cake Wrecks.

Today is Labor Day, and so I'm laboring--trying to get to all those things I've not had time to do lately, like filing and bill-paying and cleaning the kitchen and laundry. I'm not sure how this can be considered a day off, but at least I didn't have to drive to the office!

What's the deal with fart jokes?

Special came up with a new joke yesterday:

Q. Why did the elephant run away from the rabbit?
A. Because the rabbit farted!

That was the funniest thing I've heard all week.

These pinenuts are making me thirsty

Yesterday Batman and I celebrated 17 years of marital bliss. And the fact that he didn't die the night before.

We had planned to go out to dinner Saturday night at this restaurant, then go out for dessert here. When we arrived at the restaurant, we told the waiter that Batman is "deathly allergic to pinenuts," and asked him to make sure our food didn't contain them. He forgot. Long story short, Batman ended up in the emergency room, the waiter lost his job, and the manager has to foot the hospital bill.

It's rare in life that we get a do-over, but Sunday night we went out for a do-over! We skipped the meal--had our traditional Sunday-night family pizza night instead--but after dinner we dropped the kids off at GrandMom & GrandBob's and headed for Chocolata. We each ordered a crepe; mine had Nutella and strawberries and Batman's had bananas, strawberries and a dessert wine sauce.

Here's what his looked like:
And here's mine:

Happy anniversary, Batman! Let's have a less eventful celebration next time, okay?

In other news, Special lost her first tooth at day camp last week. The days before the loss had been filled with much drama and weeping and moaning over the looseness! And the wiggling! And the sheer awfulness of teeth in general! So we were all greatly relieved when she pulled the thing out.

And speaking of toothlessness, I have to show this picture of Batman and I at a redneck-themed birthday party last weekend:

I found that top at Wal-Mart--it says "True Love" and has a heart with a knife through it. I thought it was the perfect redneck top, and I'm not sure what it says about me that I plan on wearing it again with a denim jacket. I will not, however, layer it over a red bra like I did here, nor pair it with a denim mini-skirt and 4" heels. In true redneck fashion, Batman left the tags on his Miller High Life hat and returned it to the store the next day. We had lots of fun at the party, and I even got Batman to dance a little. Very little. (rim shot)

I think we've had all the excitement we need for a while now. Here's hoping that my next post will be about how boring life is!